I was in my Rifter. Not a big surprise, huh? Anyway. I was fairly concentrated inside my pod, and the junior crew members had just gone to bed in their quarters. But a Rifter is not known for its roomy interior and certainly not for sound proof walls. And that noisy warp drive probably kept the junior crew from getting deep into their beauty sleep. So, I had to leave my pod several times to calm them down. Yes, it is possible to leave your pod in a slightly modified Rifter: It’s messy and it’s a hassle - involving a lot of duct tape and cleaning up pod goo, but it is doable once you learn the tricks. Having a junior crew makes you kind of used to goo of all kinds, anyway.
All right! So, back in the pod again, I spot a Brutix on 360 degrees d-scan. It has been named after it’s unimaginative and rookie owner and with the junior crew sleeping tight, I manage to quickly narrow it down to an asteroid belt. Thankfully, that directional scanner makes very little noise.
I fire up the warp drive and prey that the junior crew now is deep into their sweet dreams. Yes! I land on top of the Brutix, locks it up within a few seconds and start spewing loads of Republic Fleet projectiles against its shields. So far: Everything goes as planned. I calmly overheat my guns and settle for a tight orbit. Probably a bit too tight, cause now the junior crew is wide awake again and demands attention - now! I leave my pod once again, while my Rifter is in tight orbit of the Brutix, run to their quarters and get back as soon as I can, only to find the gunnery indicators telling me my autocannons have burnt out! Damn! How could I be so stupid and leave my guns overheated while away from the pod?
Now, what do I do? My single rocket launcher is still going, well, not strong, but still going. But with my lousy rocket skills I’m not gonna break the tank of a Brutix with a single launcher!
I’m pondering what to do, still in orbit, firing Caldari Foxfire Rockets. This is gonna be embarrassing to let go. If I dock up and repair it will probably escape back to high security space and CONCORDS long arms. But no way the rocket launcher will take him down, so this one is probably lost. I sigh and make preparations to dock when I notice something. The armor of the Brutix is slowly withering away! What? Am I breaking his tank with my rockets? Yeah, baby! I am! Lick my moustache, Brutix!
I try to remain calm, not to wake the junior crew again, but this is just fantastic! I am taking down a battlecruiser with a single rocket launcher!* And after a reload and a little while, the Brutix explodes - and the junior crew sleeps right through it! Hooray!
A quick inspection of the the wreckage shows that the Brutix did not fit a tank whatsoever! Good luck for me, and just plain stupid by the Brutix pilot. But, hey, I like stupid!
* OK, I admit a little help from a local Serpentis Baron.